Well, cooking every morning, a wellness smoothie. Spinach, frozen blueberries, flax seed, vanilla protein powder. He’d have it on the counter with a sticky note for my two favorites. Before the pregnancy, Julian’s idea of preparing food was ordering Dominoes and calling it providing for the family. The man once tried to boil pasta and forgot the water.
So when he became a smoothie chef, I bragged to my coworker Patty about having the most thoughtful husband in Lacawana County. Patty said I should rent him out like a library book. I laughed. I’m not laughing anymore. In her office, Dr. Voss showed me my blood work, a compound I’d never heard of, elevated significantly.
Something found in prescription medication that’s extremely dangerous during pregnancy. the kind of dangerous where continued exposure could end the pregnancy and land me in a hospital. I told her I’d never been prescribed it. She nodded like she already knew. Then she asked carefully, “Is anyone giving you anything regularly? Supplements, vitamins, drinks.
My mind went to the smoothies. 8 weeks every morning.” Dr. Voss said, “These levels don’t build up by accident. Someone is giving you this deliberately. Stop consuming anything. You didn’t prepare yourself. And Candace, I think you need to leave your home. I sat in my Yundai Tucson in the parking lot. My phone buzzed. A text from Julian.
How’d the scan go, babe? Made you an extra big smoothie for when you get home. I stared at that smiley face for a very long time. Those smoothies tasted awful, by the way, like someone blended grass clippings with chalk and a prayer. But I drank everyone because I felt guilty. He was trying so hard. I even said m once to his face.
I should have trusted my taste buds from the start. I didn’t go home yet. I drove to a Walgreens parking lot 2 miles away and sat there with the engine running and one hand on my belly. I realized I couldn’t confront him because if it was true, the moment he found out I knew, I’d be in real danger.
And there was something else I’d been pushing aside. Last month, $4,200 went missing from our joint savings. Julian said it was for a transmission repair. I believed him. I always believed him. I was done believing.
I went home that evening and gave the performance of my life. smiled at Julian, told him the scan looked great. He was on the couch watching a truck racing show because of course he was, and barely looked up. “Smoothies on the counter,” he said.
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